Posted by
amos dettonville on Thursday, January 04, 2007 3:03:29 AM
yep, those are the words that came out of my mouth tonight, "honey, remember, we don't live in America anymore...." it all happened as i was passing through the kitchen, past my drive by american family, on my way out the door to work.
THE SCENARIO
as i was passing through the kitchen,
my three (soon to be four year old) was after me for yet another round
of tearful goodbye hugs, kisses, and "i love you's," when she said, "daddy, doggy (name changed to protect the innocent) bit me." she held up her fingers to show me the newly, hardly harmed dog gnawed digits.
"baby, maybe we need to rephrase that, she didn't BITE you..."
"oh yes daddy doggy (again the culprits name is concealed) bit me - here on my fingers."
from the laundry room comes the sound of my wife's voice, "we'll she (the name not to be mentioned dog) did leave a few tooth marks."
inspecting my little girl's fingers, i hear my wife continue, "... but she (aforementioned dog) did not break the skin."
3 YEAR OLDS AND DOGS
some people might not know (or
recall) the typical sport which revolves around food, dogs, and three
year olds. the dog wants food, and food in a three year old's
hand is easy prey. our great beast of a dog is a fierce female
beagle terrior mix (a fiest of sorts) weighing in somewhere around
25lbs maybe a pound or two more soaking wet.
her only crime was going for a piece of food and accidently getting a
bit of human hand in the process (which she did not bite into like she
did the tastey morsel freshly stolen). often i have explained to my
darling daughter about how dogs are made by God wanting to eat as much
as they can get at one time - and doggy here is always wanting food,
always. so never mess with a dog and their food.
THE SPORT OF CHILDLINGS
but, there's more to the mix between
a three year old and dogs with food. besides the obvious fact
that kids tend to hold food in their hands ["baby, use a spoon," or "put that down and use your fork,"]
and that food in a child's hand is much closer to dog level, there is
the added effect of how kids talk and swing their food about driving
the dog crazy.
to top that off, our kid, like many
kids, has discovered that waving food about in front of the dog is
great sport. the dog dances, shuffles, begs, hops, jumps, and goes
through numerous freestyle moves which bring laughter, smiles, delight
and those first sparks of kid cruelty to the heart of a child.
let's just say, if three year olds wrote books, mine would be composing
a "war and peace" length tome on, "how to torment the family pet with
food." another way to put it, this kids completed her masters in the
dog food arts and is applying for a doctorate - she works the poor
pooch mercilessley.
BACK TO THE KITCHEN
and so, tonight i found myself saying, "baby,
maybe we need to rephrase that, she didn't bite you ... we probably
need to say something like, 'doggy was trying to eat some food from my
hand and accidently got my fingers....'"
my wife speaks, "but, it is a bite..."
"i know dear, but
remember, honey, we don't live in America anymore ... if she goes to
school, or blurts out somewhere, 'doggy bit me,' we could lose our dog,
our child, .... remember, this isn't America anymore ... "
SADLY, IT'S TRUE
our freedoms are being stolen and
they are being lost with each passing year in this country. i
have to say, i walked about most of the night at work thinking about
how dangerous it is to live in a country where a child cannot say, "my dog bit me," without the fear of over zealous control freaks zooming in upon us like a dog on a pork chop in the hands of a three year old.
PARTING SHOT
you think i am over reacting? may i leave you with a question: why do you think pediatricians ask such questions as, "do you own any pets? dogs? what kind of dog? how big is the dog? etc.?"
i'll not even go into the handgun or other crazy questions on the
list. trust me, more and more, this is one more slice as to why,
we don't really live in the same america in which i was born.
things have and are changing - and not for the good.
peac4d.
amos dettonville